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What On Earth Are We Doing Here?

The Derelicts Reports evolved over several glorious seasons of veterans rugby. Each of the 30-odd reports is, much like the games themselves, an end in itself rather than a progression… although there is something of an inevitability about the way the Dark Days of season two ends. There are also some extra musings on tours and trips plus a few pictures of those involved. If you have other photos from the … Continue reading What On Earth Are We Doing Here?

In The Zone

It was Terry Venables, the former England football manager, who revealed the secret to his success in the game. “Fail to prepare… prepare to fail.” And this astute observation has proved as pertinent to high level kicky ball as it has to veterans rugby. To achieve one’s potential… certain things must be in place. And no Derelict worth his half-time Port takes to the field without medical … Continue reading In The Zone

A Deluded Sweaty Man Writes

Having slowed somewhat since his twenties, the former county schoolboy full back – yes, that’s right – offered his services to the Derelicts as a centre only to be shoved into action as a prop with indecent haste, from where his delusions grew and his observations of the games became rather obscure. During an “illustrious” career, Mozza played his youth rugby at Sutton & Epsom … Continue reading A Deluded Sweaty Man Writes

What On Earth Are We Doing Here?

The Derelicts Reports evolved during a period of, roughly, two glorious seasons split into sections: Happy Days and Dark Days. Each of the 30-odd reports is, much like the games themselves, an end in itself rather than a progression… although there is something of an inevitability about the way the Dark Days of season two ends. There are also some extra musings on tours and trips plus a … Continue reading What On Earth Are We Doing Here?

The Wrong Changing Room

Derelicts 0 London Irish Vets 24  “Stay there and don’t move.” Mavis The Matador did as he was told and stood, self-consciously, between the racks of towels and bathroom mirrors, laden with an unfeasible variety of shopping bags that had grown heavier as the long, long afternoon had worn on. It had been dark for hours. All he wanted now was a sherbet and a sitdown, … Continue reading The Wrong Changing Room

On the road with the Alickadoos

With Kinger and Birdsworth missing in action, one in Toulon, the other in Redhill, veteran reporter ‘Lunchtime O’ Booze’ comes out of retirement for this week’s report. Good to see that all that internet editing malarky hasn’t blunted the quill. Now read on……… Dings 19 Dorking 1st XV 32 The bickering among the most senior members of the club started before we’d even set off.   Asbo Kane arrived … Continue reading On the road with the Alickadoos